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Top Ten Tuesday: 5 Books To A Better You

I used to participate in Top Ten Tuesday when I first started blogging and it was a wonderful way to meet fellow bloggers! I thought with coming back from a hiatus, and a bit of a lack of inspiration on my part, participating again would be a great idea. So, every Tuesday (if the topic interests me) I’ll be sharing a Top Ten Tuesday post. Top Ten Tuesday is hosted by The Artsy Reader Girl! Make sure to check out her page explaining everything you need to know, including future topics. 


Today’s topic is a FREEBIE. The direction I chose is more of a personal one. Lately, I’ve been struggling with my mental health. I’ve been struggling with setting boundaries with demanding and toxic family members in my life. Balancing my mental health and their needs has been difficult for me and has actually become a burden on other areas of my life. While I don’t want to go into too much detail of my personal issues, I will say that this struggle has pushed me to explore my needs and wants more. This includes searching for self-help books – a genre I have literally never had any interest in until the last 6 months. So, you could say today’s topic is about a genre I want to give a chance to, or books that can help me (or you) become the best version of ourselves. Either way, here are 5 self-help books on my immediate TBR.


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EFFORTLESS by GREG MCKEOWN
[Goodreads]

Is there a goal you want to make progress on, if only you had the energy? Do you assume that anything worth doing must take tremendous effort? Have you ever abandoned a hard but important activity for an easy but trivial one? Are you often overwhelmed by the complexity that’s expanding everywhere?

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, you might be making life much harder for yourself than it needs to be…

I recently finished the first book by McKeown called Essentialism. It was the first self-help type of book I’ve ever read and I absolutely loved it. It could be repetitive at times, and not everything was a super unique idea, but it was a great motivation for me. It also sparked my interest into searching for more self-help style books. So, I definitely want to read Effortless, his second book to see if it helps me streamline my routines and what I say yes or no to. If you need to learn how to say NO more often, I recommend his first book.

“No.” is a complete sentence.


SET BOUNDARIES, FIND PEACE: A GUIDE TO RECLAIMING YOURSELF by NEDRA GLOVER TAWWAB
[Goodreads]

End the struggle, speak up for what you need, and experience the freedom of being truly yourself.

Healthy boundaries. We all know we should have them–in order to achieve work/life balance, cope with toxic people, and enjoy rewarding relationships with partners, friends, and family. But what do healthy boundaries really mean–and how can we successfully express our needs, say no, and be assertive without offending others?

I found this book after I listened Amanda Anderson, the author of All My Friends Have Issues, speak at my local MOPs group meeting in which she spoke about setting boundaries. I wanted to find a book more about boundaries and less about friendships, like Anderson’s book was about. It led me to this one. One of the things I struggle with is setting boundaries with those around me. I’m very much a people pleaser, so even if something makes me feel uncomfortable, I don’t say anything. This is something that needs to change for me to become a better parent, partner, and person. So, I bought this. It also has a workbook that you can buy separately to accompany it.


HOW TO DO THE WORK: RECOGNIZE YOUR PATTERNS, HEAL FROM YOUR PAST, AND CREATE YOURSELF by NICOLE LAPERA
[Goodreads]

“…In How to Do the Work, she offers both a manifesto for SelfHealing as well as an essential guide to creating a more vibrant, authentic, and joyful life. Drawing on the latest research from a diversity of scientific fields and healing modalities, Dr. LePera helps us recognize how adverse experiences and trauma in childhood live with us, resulting in whole body dysfunction—activating harmful stress responses that keep us stuck engaging in patterns of codependency, emotional immaturity, and trauma bonds. Unless addressed, these self-sabotaging behaviors can quickly become cyclical, leaving people feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, and unwell.

I discovered this author via Twitter. Every time I go on Twitter, I come across one of her threads about childhood trauma and relationships. A lot of them resonate with me. So, I thought I’d go ahead and try her book. This one also has a workbook you can buy separately called How To Meet Yourself.


THE COMMON RULE: HABITS OF PURPOSE FOR AN AGE OF DISTRACTION by JUSTIN WHITMEL EARLEY
[Goodreads]

…The answer to our contemporary chaos is to practice a rule of life that aligns our habits to our beliefs. The Common Rule offers four daily and four weekly habits, designed to help us create new routines and transform frazzled days into lives of love for God and neighbor. Justin Earley provides concrete, doable practices, such as a daily hour of phoneless presence or a weekly conversation with a friend…

This one is a little different for me in that it is a faith-based view. I don’t talk about my own faith often, and that’s mostly due to the fact that I don’t have one. I didn’t grow up going to church, I’ve never read the Bible, and I always said I didn’t believe in God. That is, up until more recently, when my life has been a bit harder and I’ve found myself drawn to exploring my faith. I feel like this book will have a good balance of practical tools for anyone, and tools for those that are religious, and I can customize as I see fit (and as I explore my own beliefs). It never hurts to try something new. He also has a book called Habits of the Household: Practicing the Story of God in Everyday Family Rhythms – which might have a little too many faith-based habits for me but could prove to be helpful for some!


BE KIND TO YOURSELF by MEGAN LOGAN
[Amazon]

…The book is organized into chapters that follow the seasonal rhythm of life (and can be started at any time of the year). Learn how to rest and recharge in winter, get ready for growth in spring, live life to the fullest in summer, and free yourself from past hurts in fall. Each chapter introduces a relatable theme, provides accessible teaching, offers thoughtful insights, and provides creative activities to help you process, reflect, and grow. A group guide is even included!

I recently completed a similar workbook called Self-Love Workbook for Women by the same author and thought it was wonderful. This is a much longer, 52-week challenge that I think could be just as therapeutic for me. The original one asked tough questions and forced me to explore who I am rather than what everyone around me wants. Which is super important for me.

Do you read self-help books? Do you have any recommendations? Will you check out any of the ones on this list?

28 Comments

  • Reply holley4734 02/28/2023 at 5:59 am

    Thanks for the recommendations! I think I might read Be Kind to Yourself and How to Do the Work. 🙂

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 6:04 pm

      The workbook is one I’ll be starting up soon! I love the little challenges and questions she gives you. And I’m definitely excited for How to Do the Work. I hope you enjoy if you do read them!

  • Reply Lydiaschoch 02/28/2023 at 6:08 am

    This is a beautiful list, Molly.

    I don’t want to pry, so I won’t ask you any questions about your situation. All I’ll say is that I also have toxic relatives and have struggled with my mental health. You are not alone, and i hope life improves for you soon.

    My post: https://lydiaschoch.com/top-ten-tuesday-xenofiction/

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 6:03 pm

      Thank you so much! Dealing with toxic relatives is not an easy task. Luckily I have my son and my husband! I hope you have a support system too <3

  • Reply the bookworm 02/28/2023 at 10:33 am

    Good for you on setting boundaries, it’s so important. I’ve always been a people pleaser and didn’t even realize what setting boundaries meant. So a few years ago when I finally started setting boundaries, it was amazing to see the people in my life who had a problem with my boundaries, it’s eye opening for sure.
    Wonderful list, I follow Nicole LePera online and I love her posts and insights. I have her books on my wishlist. Happy reading!

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 6:01 pm

      I am such a people pleaser, it’s a problem haha But yeah…I’ve been more consistent in my boundaries and it’s really been eye opening seeing how those who should be supportive, just aren’t! LePera is great, at least twitter haha I’m excited to read her book 🙂

  • Reply iloveheartlandx 02/28/2023 at 12:12 pm

    I hope you find these books useful!
    My TTT: https://jjbookblog.wordpress.com/2023/02/28/top-ten-tuesday-409/

  • Reply anovelglimpse 02/28/2023 at 12:59 pm

    I probably need to read all of these. haha

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 5:58 pm

      hahah life is hard sometimes. I get it. I hope you enjoy any that you do read!

  • Reply Leslie 02/28/2023 at 3:32 pm

    I’m really sorry that you are going through this. I struggle with boundaries and toxic relationships as well. I went a whole year without talking to my sister. It was insanely hard but I had to stand up for myself and say NO. We started talking again at the end of last year and things have been much better, if not more surface level. I think she finally understood that I just couldn’t take it anymore. It’s such a horrible and anxiety filled thing to go through. I really hope some of these books have helped you. I would highly recommend a therapist! My best friend has been going to one for two years for the same thing. It’s helped her a lot and she’s given me some tips. After I have this baby, I will be finding one as well. <3

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 6:00 pm

      Thank you so much! Boundaries are so hard to set and be consistent with, especially for those that are close to you. It’s a daily process. I actually haven’t spoken to my sister in at least five years (I’ve honestly lost count at this point), so I get it. That’s wonderful a therapist has helped with your friend! Also, congratulations on being pregnant – that’s so wonderful!

      • Reply Leslie 03/01/2023 at 6:31 am

        You are right! It’s a constant battle but and very hard. I’m sorry about that- it’s so hard to cut out family. I really hope you find some way to set boundaries and be happy with it! Thank you so much!! 😊

  • Reply curlygeek04 02/28/2023 at 4:45 pm

    These all sound like books I’d find helpful, especially the ones by Tawwab and LaPera. I’ve been reading more self-help lately, so thanks for the recommendations.

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 02/28/2023 at 5:58 pm

      I’m super excited to start LaPera’s book! What she shares on social media has been super helpful for me, so I’m looking forward to diving in deeper. Hope you enjoy if you do read them!

  • Reply WendyW 02/28/2023 at 6:13 pm

    Great list of books. I like Be Kind to Yourself.

  • Reply Jen | Book Den 03/01/2023 at 3:56 am

    I hope you wind up loving your time with all of these!

  • Reply Cindy Davis 03/01/2023 at 1:03 pm

    I do read self-help books. I recommend Get Your Life Back:Everyday Practices for a World Gone Mad by John Eldredge.

  • Reply Rebecca Trotter 03/01/2023 at 6:08 pm

    Great list – setting boundaries is so important. I hope life is getting better for you.

  • Reply thebookishlibra 03/02/2023 at 6:17 pm

    I don’t usually read self help books, but I have seen several people talk about how useful the Be Kind to Yourself book has been for them.

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 03/03/2023 at 8:26 pm

      I thought the first one was great! I’m excited to dive into the second one.

  • Reply lindseyhabets 03/07/2023 at 11:54 am

    I’m sorry to hear you’ve been going through some issues with toxic family members. Hope these books will be of help to you. I like the idea of Be Kind to Yourself.

    • Reply Molly's Book Nook 03/07/2023 at 5:11 pm

      Thank you! And yes! I enjoyed the first workbook for that one, so I’m excited to start the next one.

  • Reply Top Ten Tuesday: 5 Podcasts That Will Spook You or Motivate You – Molly's Book Nook 03/21/2023 at 5:32 am

    […] originally read McKeown’s book Essentialism, which brought me to his podcast. The episodes are short and easy to consume. Plus, I enjoy the […]

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